Fourth of Caesar Salad Day

We hold parades to celebrate a country where people care more about economics than trans lives. Where the diminished overrepresentation of the white man is the crisis of the moment. Where men wearing “fuck illegals” shirts hire undocumented folks to groom their 15 acres and then hit the polls to vote for their deportation.

Happy National Caesar Salad Day.

Let’s celebrate salad because what’s not yummy is a country where “guilty of 34 counts” gets you a presidential bid if you’re white, while stealing baby formula gets you Rikers if you’re black. You know what’s not patriotic? A Pulse victim for every state - or maybe that is exactly the America we call Great. Because, really, what’s more American than gun violence? What’s more American than children hiding in closets?

Other closets.

I bet your dad says “they” when he talks about a hypothetical person and then argues that it’s not “grammatically correct” when referring to someone nonbinary. What’s more American than that? Something to talk about over your salad: that language is actually made up by the humans who cite it as law.

What if we celebrated family reunification not caging humans like animals? What if we had a parade for salad today instead? For antiracists who eat salad. What if we paraded an ideology that doesn’t kill? Would you show up?